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In the second of two blog posts, Ruth Hodierne, Clinical Nurse Specialist, Sussex Liaison & Diversion for Youth, gives us some tips on keeping calm during lockdown.

Advice for Parents during lockdown

  1. Normalise Anxiety – anxiety can be healthy. Adults can help young people appreciate that health anxiety has a purpose: it alerts us to potential threats. “Feeling some anxiety makes sense right now. You’re having the right reaction to the emerging news about the coronavirus”. 
  2. Shift the Spotlight – Research suggests that during difficult times teenagers feel better when they turn their attention to supporting others. Teenagers that provided the highest levels of social support to other were the ones who went on to express the most confidence in their ability to face challenges in their own lives. Remind them by washing their hands regularly and staying home is not only protecting ourselves but easing the strain on health services.
  3. Reassure your child that it is unlikely they will get seriously ill, and if they do feel ill you will look after them. Your child might be concerned about who will look after you if you catch the virus. Let them know the kind of support you have as an adult so they do not feel they need to worry about you. 
  4. Keep as many regular routines as possible, so that your child feels safe and that things are stable.

Where to find help

Visit www.childrensmentalhealthmatters.org to read the resources on how to talk to your child about the coronavirus.

B&H wellbeing service (young people):
(There is online counselling that can be accessed online for 13-17 year olds)

Allsorts and Mind Out for LGBTQ+ young people
(Not offering face to face contact, however, there is support online)

StayAlive app

A Band of Brothers – charity for helping young men with mental health

NHS Mental Health Support Lines

YoungMinds

Survivors Network (18 and under service)

Samaritans

YMCA YAC (Youth Advice Centre)
continuing to provide support via phone

Read Ruth’s first blog post about staying calm, connected and avoiding conflict at home.

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On World Health Day, we asked our team to send us a photo of themselves to thank those who are looking out for our health. We’d like to say a huge thank you to all the NHS staff, care workers, key workers and all those working to keep us healthy and safe.

On that note, and in case you missed them, psychotherapist Donna Peters-Lamb from Make Sense Psychotherapy has created a couple of really useful videos to help us with our mental health. They include tips and techniques on how to stop that worrying brain – and advice to help parents who are trying to keep a sense of calm in the home.

If you’re feeling anxious – and who isn’t at the moment? – then take a few minutes for yourself and watch these videos.

If there’s something specific you’d like us to cover, or have a question, please leave a comment below or get in touch via the Contact form. Take care x

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In the first of two blog posts, Ruth Hodierne, Clinical Nurse Specialist, Sussex Liaison & Diversion for Youth, gives us some tips on keeping calm during lockdown.

HOW TO STAY CALM

Plan your days 
Disruption of a normal routine can be stressful. Take some time to write down how you want to spend your day. Creating and sticking to a new routine will give you a sense of order and normality.

Mindfulness 
There are lots of free apps you can use to guide you through breathing techniques and meditation that can help ease your anxiety and clear your mind of anxious thoughts. Headspace or Smiling Mind are free mindfulness apps.

Clean up your social media 
You may be spending more time online so try and unfollow or mute accounts that make you feel anxious, upset or angry and find positive accounts like Young Minds (Twitter, Instagram, Facebook) that boost your mood and share your interests.

Take a break from the news 
It can be tempting to constantly have the news on in the background, this can have a negative impact on your mental health. Try limiting how often you check the news.

HOW TO STAY CONNECTED

Board games are a great way to spend time with friends or family and a lot of these can be played online, like Monopoly or Chess, or through apps such as Words With Friends.

Video Calls – phone calls are amazing but seeing someone’s face really can make a huge difference. It can lift your mood and make you feel less lonely. 

HOW TO DEAL WITH STRESSFUL SITUATIONS AT HOME

Create a rota 
If you’re in a situation where lots of people are fighting over the TV, who cooks or cleans, then get together and create a rota and to avoid arguments.

Get changed every morning 
Change from what you’ve slept in, even if it’s into a clean pair of pyjamas. This will do wonders for your mood.

Walk away from tense situations if you can 
You can think and plan for the situations or people that you foresee being difficult over the next few months. You can ask a friend to call you at a certain time of the day that you expect to be problematic. This can give you a natural reason to leave a room and take a break from an intense or potentially confrontational situation. Or set an alarm and match your alarm tone to your ring tone, needing to take a call gives you a legitimate reason to leave the room. 

Create a list of “safe conversation topics” that you can refer to when things get awkward or difficult. Similarly, create a list of conversation topics that you feel are best to avoid.

Create a Hope Box
It is understandable how the recent increase in anxiety and fear may impact your thoughts of suicide. If you are at home and looking for ways to manage your thoughts of suicide, you could create a Hope Box which is filled with sensory items, such as photographs of the people you love, your favourite perfume, or song lyrics that resonate with you. Papyrus has a great how-to sheet on creating a Hope Box

Useful Apps and Numbers:

‘Stay Alive’ App where you can work on keeping safe from suicide.

YoungMinds Crisis Messenger Service, Text YM to 85258 for free 24/7 mental health support if you are having a mental health crisis.

Childline, if you’re under 19 you can confidentially call, email or chat online about any problem. Freephone 24/7 helpline 0800 1111.

The Mix, if you’re under 25 you can talk free on the phone, by email or on their webchat. You can also use their phone counselling services. Freephone 0808 808 4994 (1pm-11pm daily).

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Journalist Jan Edwards describes how an ordinary day of door-to-door fundraising led to his involvement with Make (Good) Trouble. 

It was early January, and winter had firmly clasped its unrelenting, icy grip on Brighton and Hove, suffocating the distant memories of summer. 

Shivering, my resolve to fundraise for homeless young people spurred me on. I started a new road, willing an answer for some warmth. I knocked, but there was no response. Maybe the next… “Hello! Sorry, I was cooking.” I rushed back. “Hi, I’m from Centrepoint.” “Ah, I know all about you!” says the woman, smiling. “Come in.” 

While door-to-door fundraising can be discouraging, I relished meeting all sorts of strange, eccentric, but often wonderful people. At Centrepoint, I was yelled at, sworn at and chased down a garden path with a broom (only to be invited in for tea and an art lesson by the less cranky next-door-neighbour!).

Naturally, I was intrigued by this friendly woman who had provided respite from winter’s wrath. “You don’t need to say anything. I’ll sign up,” she said. I was bemused as even the most willing of donors usually take some persuasion. “I work for a social enterprise called Make (Good) Trouble, helping teenagers. I’m Daisy, the co-founder.” 

Daisy explained that her company aims to challenge society’s narrative that young people are a nuisance. The media is often full of teenagers’ misdemeanours, so Make (Good) Trouble uses it to celebrate their achievements and improve mental health. Based on my passion for helping young people from my own experiences, I was eager to get involved. 

As a teenager, I suffered from low self-esteem, unexplainable anger and bouts of anxiety and depression. This informed my behaviour: impulsiveness, drinking and trouble at home and school. In fact, I spent more time out of school than in! If only I’d had a means to express my feelings, to channel my complex coil of emotions. 

Enterprises like Make (Good) Trouble are essential if other suffering teens are to make a difference in the world, inspiring creativity and motivation. As a journalist, I feel that nothing boosts self-confidence more than completing a project and seeing the results. “I would love to help,” I enthused, leaving with Daisy’s number and feeling warm inside and out. 

I was delighted when Daisy scheduled a meeting to discuss my involvement with Make (Good) Trouble. She explained how revered the enterprise has become, securing a donation from Sussex Police. “We have Project Poppy coming up, which looks at women’s mental health in the First World War. It’ll be perfect for you.”

My Grandad is a Holocaust survivor, so I am familiar with the impact of war. A survivor of three camps, Grandad has harrowing memories which he seldom discusses. He was taken away from his mother as a child, and never saw her again. Nobody knows what became of her. A story lost. 

Indeed, the impact of war on women is rarely considered. I realised that in learning about the First World War, the experiences of wives, of female nurses and doctors were not taught. With a Mum who won the NHS “Woman of the Year” award, I know how strong women are. It is imperative that the stories of these heroes be told. 

Meeting with Tayler, Daisy’s sister and project leader, I was amazed at her research and determination to bring the project to fruition. “Mental health is a current issue”, Tayler said. “We want young people to get involved and to compare mental health then with what’s happening today. We want everyone involved in the project to help build a picture of a fictional woman, Poppy, who lived through the War and use media to flesh out what her experiences might have been, to bring her to life.”

This project is part of the First World War Centenary, a programme set up by the National Lottery Heritage Fund that aims to help people understand the war, uncover its stories and explore what it means to us today, creating a link between then and now. Project Poppy participants will research the subject and create a film and a blog detailing the process, plus a presentation for schools.

Students at Hove Park School are participating in the project and we met up with them before the schools were closed due to the coronavirus. I was struck by the young people there, their compassion and confidence as they created diagrams of influences on mental health, both in the First World War and now. “Have you ever had mental health issues?” one girl asked. “Most of us have.” I was confused:  happy with her openness, but sad at the prevalence of mental health issues she had expressed. 

Walking home from the school that day, I was lost in thought. Isn’t it great how open young people are about mental health now, actively wanting to enact change? I smile. One thing’s certain: It’s incredible how interrupting someone’s cooking caused me to get involved with such an inspiring project.

Jan Edwards

We’re having to re-think Project Poppy due to the coronavirus lockdown. Make (Good) Trouble is now looking at ways to share the project online which will mean that more young people can get involved if they’re interested. Watch this space!